Bad day at the office?

We all have tough days

We have all had those days when we wonder why we are doing the job we do; when nothing seems to go to plan and it all turns to skittles.  In midwifery, it could be something simple like missing a vein when trying to take blood or something much more serious and tragic.

It takes an enormous emotional input to be in a caring profession.  Self care is vitally important to ensure you can give the very best to the women in your care, because if you constantly give without putting something back into yourself, you will soon run empty.

Oreo cookie icecream is a must

Here are my top tips for coping with those bad days at the office:

Treat yourself
Eat chocolate, watch your favourite film, listen to your favourite music, go for a run – anything that will release endorphins.  The first step is to boost your mood. This can start on your journey home
from work, turn the radio up, open the windows and let the wind blow the shift away.

Reflect
Don’t wallow, but think about the experience; what happened, how did it make you feel, what was good or bad about the situation, what have you learnt from it, what would you do differently if it happened again.  Every experience is a learning opportunity, even if it is “I will never do that again”.

Share
Find someone you can talk to, and cry with if need be.  Debriefing a serious incident is as important for you as it is for the parents, as it helps you to make sense of the situation and will aid your

We all need a help! button

reflection.  Remember, you have a responsibility of confidentiality and cannot share personal information of patients, but having another person to talk to will stop you rerunning it over in your mind.

Remember the good experiences
It can be very easy to get into a negative mindset.  The best way to break this cycle is to focus on better times; remember your first delivery, the best feedback you got from an essay.  I believe the bad experiences are made worse because they happen so infrequently, so remember to look at all the positive things which have gone before.

Tomorrow is a new day
Move on.  Practice in light of what you have learnt from your reflection, but don’t get trapped thinking it is going to happen again.

Its all worth it in the end

Hope this has helped. See you next week!

Take 2

My new theatre

I am often met by surprise when I explain what my career was before starting my training.  It does seem quite a jump to go from theatre to midwifery, but with half of my family working within the NHS, the change has always seemed more natural to me.

I had a few fears about returning to university for a second time.
Initially, I was reluctant to admit that I hadn’t made the right decision the first time.  I have always been the sort of person to agonise over the decisions I make.  I cried when I had to choose my GCSEs, scared that my teachers would no longer like me if I didn’t choose their subject.  In retrospect this is completely ridiculous, but for a 14 year old the overwhelming fear that the choices I made in that moment would dictate my future was a very real one. 

So when I realised the theatre wasn’t the right world for me, it took me a while to adapt to this. I knew I wanted a career, not just a job, so I was never looking for a quick fix.  It was however quite a

Its not easy to get on to a course!

commitment to agree to complete another three year degree.  Being a student again also wasn’t massively appealing; I had a nice life in London, earning a good salary and going to the theatre whenever I wanted so the prospect of limited funds, deadlines and assignments wasn’t something I was looking forward to.  It wasn’t long however, until I remembered all the brilliant parts about being a student.

I love learning, and from speaking to my friend who was half way through her training, I was absolutely fascinated about the process of pregnancy and birth.  There was also the opportunity to make a new group of friends, something which I am always open to.  Making friends at university is completely different from making friends at school – at school, you are friends because you are in the same form class, or you sit next to each other in Biology, but in higher education, you are brought together by a shared passion and interest.  In my experience, it leads to closer and longer lasting friendships.  It did cross my mind that I would be the eldest in the group, but I soon realised that midwifery attracts people of all ages and backgrounds.

The joys of being a mature student

I also had to consider that midwifery was a completely new subject for me.  I had not studied any science since my GCSEs, some seven years previous!  I also hadn’t always wanted to be a midwife in the same way I had always longed to be on the stage.  My move to midwifery was a considered decision, looking at my interests and personality strengths.  Although I had the bizarre experience of applying through UCAS at the same time as the students I was teaching, returning to study was one of the best decisions I have ever made.  I have never looked back.

I can hear the bells!

My friend is getting married tomorrow.  I am currently dashing back from Germany to be there, and I am so excited.  She is the second of this particular group to get married and as well as having the

I do...want to do this!

honour of watching her getting hitched to the love of her life, it also means an opportunity to catch up with the girls.

I refuse to believe I am old enough to get married, although many of my friends are determined to prove me wrong.  Of my two groups of friends from Loughborough University, we have had 6 weddings, 4 children and 8 homes bought!  It seems like it is just me lagging behind still as a student.

It’s funny where life takes you.  When I left school at 18, I didn’t know what I wanted to do.  I went to university because I always knew that was what followed A-levels, rather than having a game plan in place.  I studied Drama because I was passionate about it, and had a smidge of talent.  It was very daunting therefore when I left university the first time because I didn’t know what I wanted to be! 

The most optimistic part of me wanted to pursue acting.  I had dreams of being snapped up by a casting director as I walked down the road, but of course, this hardly ever happens.  So, I started working as a teaching assistant because I couldn’t find any other work and really enjoyed it.  I then had an opportunity to move to London for three months as my friend was going travelling and wondered if I wanted to take her room in the flat.  I had saved enough money to cover the rent so I decided to take her offer up.

Spot the Drama student

 A few weeks after settling into city life, I contacted the National Youth Theatre, of which I was a member, asking if they wanted any help, stuffing letters, making tea, that sort of thing.  They emailed me back and soon I was working as an expenses paid intern.  This was followed with an offer of a job working within the Creative Learning department and before I knew it three months had turned into two years.   The friend whose room I had taken came back and, along with her now fiancé (husband tomorrow!) lived in the lounge until they found a place of their own.

I was starting to think however, that a job in the Theatre wasn’t right for me.  Although I helped to run the Access to Higher Education course the NYT ran, much of my work was office based and I was beginning to get cabin fever.  I love a spreadsheet as much as the next geek, but I knew my future was in something more practical. 

It was either teaching or something medical.  I applied for Midwifery after being inspired by an old school friend who had recently started her training and the rest is history as they say.

It’s never too late to embark on a new career.  See you next week.

We're all going on a (belated) Easter holiday!

As you read this, I will be (hopefully) sunning myself by a pool in Germany because I am off on my hols!  Not that it will all be relaxing and sightseeing for 1) I have a chest infection and 2) I am taking my best friend 'Dissertation' with me.

Celebrate!

I am determined to be cheery though.  I have had my nails painted and I am going to spend two weeks thinking of anything other than the 10 births I have left to catch.

As a midwifery student, our terms don’t fall in line with the majority of the university.  There is no three month summer vacation for us!  It was most strange going to work as a second year on a Friday and then as a third year the following Monday last September.  I still haven’t got used to being referred to as a senior student. 

At university last week we were discussing labour ward management.  We had to imagine we were the coordinating midwife and had to assign our staff to the various women who needed care.  There were a few heated discussions as we all tried to decide who was best placed to go into each of the rooms – I heard phrases like, “well, we wouldn’t do it like that in our Trust”, “you can’t ask a student to do that!” coming from all the tables.  It was one of those annoying tasks where there is no right answer, as long as you can explain why you have done what you have.  It made me certain of one thing though – there is no way I want to be a senior midwife on labour ward!

One of my favourite things is to imagine where my friends will go with their careers.  There are some who are perfect for the wards, others more suited to labour ward.  There are a couple of people I can

I've often been likened to Miranda Hart

foresee specialising in a certain client group.  For me, community is where I have always wanted to be.  Although I love delivering babies, what I prefer is building a relationship with a woman and her family as she journeys through her pregnancy and then meeting their little bundle of joy when they get home.  It is always so rewarding to witness a woman as she grows in confidence and becomes a mother.

Throughout your training you will be able to witness the whole spectrum of midwifery; it's so exciting when you discover where you want to practice.

Bis bald!

A week in the life of a student midwife

Friday
Instead of going to university today we had a directed study day based around the Morecambe Bay Investigation.  It didn’t make for very pleasant reading.  If you haven’t read it, I would encourage you to do so.  It would be a fantastic thing to discuss in any interviews you may have.  For me it reminded me of the importance of multidisciplinary working and effective communication.  Professional relationships can be a tricky thing to negotiate, especially in the high pressure environment of the labour ward.  The most important thing is to ensure the woman remains at the centre of everyone’s focus and this will hopefully ensure a positive outcome for everyone.

Saturday and Sunday
My weekend started with work; the final session of antenatal education.  It was brilliant once again.  I learnt so much about how a baby’s brain develops.  For example, I didn’t realise that a baby could recognise its mother by smell from birth, by sound at 10 days old and by sight at 3 months.
After this, I made my way to the outskirts of London to spend a couple of days with an old friend.  We watched some (terrible) films and drank lots of tea.  She is 6 months pregnant so she had lots of questions and I was able to share with her what I had learnt in the morning.  It was delightful.

Monday
Back to work, and I was in clinic all day.  Back-to-back appointments can be quite draining but it also gave me an opportunity to practice my clinical skills in abdominal palpation, fetal heart auscultation, blood pressure reading and taking blood.  I am getting to grips with planning care and what happens at each appointment, but there is a lot to remember.
I am so looking forward to the day that I have my own clinic.  I have always felt most comfortable working in the community; I enjoy seeing the women throughout their pregnancy and building a rapport with them.  It is also wonderful to have a cuddle with their new baby when they come home!

Tuesday
Another clinic today, but mostly for postnatal women which meant different clinical skills to practice.  Newborn blood spot tests, infant checks, weighing and breastfeeding support to name just a few.
After work, I rushed back home to get changed and then met a friend to go to the cinema.  We saw Will Smith’s new film- Focus.  I really enjoyed it, and not just because of the numerous topless scenes!

Wednesday
Although I was on a late shift, my morning was filled with a course meeting.  As I am set rep I have to go to various meetings from time to time.  Today’s meeting was a forum for the set reps to bring any concerns or questions to the teaching team.  It’s wonderful to have such an open interaction with the staff and to know they value our opinion so much.
The meeting ran a little late so I raced (whilst keeping to the speed limit of course) across town to meet my community mentor.  I had the most amazing shift and it was the perfect ending to my community placement.  I am looking forward to returning to delivery suite next week though, and getting my remaining 11 births!

Thursday
Finally, a day off!  After sleeping in and cleaning my bathroom, I sat down to work quite a lot later than I had hoped.  I am starting to make some headway with my dissertation but not enough to own up to my word count!  I was very grateful for the fantastic library resources available at UoB today.  My first literature search brought up over 6000 results!
This afternoon I popped into town to get a birthday card for my step-mum and have dinner with a friend before coming home and doing some revision for our interview preparation day tomorrow.

See you next week!

Learning from the students

For the past three weekends I have been attending the antenatal classes we offer in Luton.  The course explores all aspects of labour, birth and life with a new baby.  It has been fascinating meeting this group of women and their partners and learning from them. 

It is very easy to follow our own agenda as midwives; focusing on the advice we need to give and the clinical features we have to monitor.  It is far too easy to forget that the parents will have their own motives when accessing maternity services.  They come with their own unique experience, understanding, hopes, fears and questions.

Although, as I am coming to the end of my course, I have a solid knowledge base, talking to these parents I realise there is still a lot more to learn.  I had forgotten, for example, how difficult it can be to change a nappy on a squirming baby.  For some of the couples in the group, their child will be the first contact they have ever had with a newborn.  It must be an extremely daunting prospect knowing you are completely responsible for caring for this little human.

Being a midwife is so much more than delivering babies.  It is supporting a woman as she makes the exciting and terrifying journey into motherhood.  One of the simplest ways we can do this is through antenatal education classes.

It makes sense that the better prepared you are for something, the better the outcome will be.  For example, when you take an exam at school, you will often do a mock paper in advance and your

teacher will explain the format of the examination.  They can’t tell you what the questions will be, but they reduce the stress you feel by removing any other uncertainties you may have.  Imagine you had to sit your last ever A Level examination and you didn’t know where it was taking place or what you would have to do.  Understandably you would not do well.

The same applies for labour and birth.  Many women are scared of the prospect of giving birth because they don’t understand what will happen to them.  They may have watched One Born Every Minute and expect that their labour will neatly fit into the edited one hour programme they have seen on channel 4.  This is not the case.  They expect it to hurt and that they won’t be able to cope with that pain.  This is also not always true.  Usually when we are in pain, it is because we are not well and our body is telling us that something is wrong. In labour however, the body sends out hormones which act as a natural analgesia.  If the woman can understand the process her body is going through, instead of being scared of being in pain, she can embrace it and realise that it is helping her to meet her baby.  With the correct preparation and belief in her amazing body, a mother can do wondrous things.

I am so grateful for the opportunity of being a part of the journey for the couples I have met in antenatal classes and thank them for reminding me of the importance of the softer skills of midwifery.  See you next week!

Flat Pack Furniture and Flat Mates

Last weekend I moved once again.  In my 27, nearly 28, years of life, I have lived in 11 different houses, with 30 different people (not all at the same time).  I have lived with family members, strangers and friends and I can tell you this – you don’t really know someone until you live with them.

Student Village

My mum tells me when she dropped me off at university at the tender age of 18, she cried because she was scared I wouldn’t make any friends.  Hopefully, this isn’t because she thinks I am a social pariah but more because I didn’t know anyone.  I must admit, when I waved her goodbye I sat on my bed and wondered if I had made the right decision.  Then there was a flurry of knocks on my door and a second year student came bursting in. Her name was Katie and she soon became a close friend - which is fortunate, because we shared a bathroom. 

I loved living in student accommodation when I did my first degree.  I had an immediate group of friends, all doing different courses to me and whom I went on to live with out of halls.  So it felt only natural to do the same when I started at the University of Bedfordshire.  I wasn’t familiar with Luton so living in student accommodation right in the centre of town was extremely convenient whilst I was finding my feet.  I also didn’t drive at the time so was relived to discover the university, bus routes and shopping were all in easy walking distance.

One of my favourite passive aggressive notes

 There is a knack to sharing a house or halls of residence with other people as other people’s habits will drive you up the wall if you let them.  Door slamming, milk stealing, hair in plug holes, late night music blaring – I have lived with them all.  You have to remember, it is only temporary.  There are also massive positives; another person’s DVD collection to raid, someone to make you a cup of tea when you are hung-over, someone to help you put together your flat pack furniture as you try to make a room, a home.  As long as the benefits outweigh the negatives, stick with it.  If not, move on.

Flat mates are a staple of university life.  Hopefully you will be as lucky as me and make some life long friends.  See you next week.

Housemates for three years, friends forever

Wanted: more time

I would like to borrow Bernard's watch!

I can’t quite believe we are in March already.  I’m sure time travels quicker the older I become!  I have been told many times that my final year will go past in a blink of an eye, and I am starting to realise the truth in this cliché.

According to the countdown app on my phone, I have 187 days left of my degree.  This fact terrifies and excites me in equal measure.  I am also reliably informed that there are 84 days until my dissertation deadline.  *Please excuse me for a moment of mad panic.*

I have been considering my dissertation topic since I first put in my UCAS application.  At that time, I was interested in choice of birth place as my nephew had recently been born at home.  Then when I started my course, and especially after being a patient myself, I become fascinated by communication within healthcare, particularly between clinician and service user.  As it turns out, I am doing neither of these topics for my dissertation. 

Everyone has moments which completely change their perspective on life.  For me, one of these was the first time I cared for someone whose baby had died.  I remember feeling completely inadequate and ever since then bereavement care has become a passion of mine.  It seemed only natural therefore for this to be the topic for my (mini) tome.

Grumpy Cat feels my pain

My biggest stumbling block when it comes to writing is that I am a perfectionist.  If something doesn’t flow flawlessly, I delete it. This makes the thought of writing 10,000 words extremely daunting. Consequently, I have spent a lot of time formatting my title page and searching for literature.  Now, I need to put pen, or curser, to paper. 

By no means do I have all the answers when it comes to writing an essay, but 6 years of academic writing has taught me a few lessons;

Read the question thoroughly
Highlight the important words in the question – this will give you focus in your writing.

Dissertation = an excuse for new stationary

Start with a detailed plan
Write down all your ideas and start to put it in an order.  This will probably change as you start writing but it will ensure you don’t forget anything you wanted to say.

Begin early
It is possible to pull an all-nighter and write a 2000 word essay the day before the deadline but it is not advisable.  It will never be your best work.

Leave time for proof reading
There will come a point when you can’t see the mistakes any more.  When this happens, you will need a set of fresh eyes in the form of a friend or family member.

No doubt I will discuss my dissertation in a future blog post.  Hopefully I will have made more of a dent in the word count when I do!  Until then, see you next week.

Getting organised

This week I have been full of cold so have appreciated my bed when I can finally crawl into it.  It is usually when I settle down to sleep however, that I suddenly remember everything that the day’s events have put to the back of my mind, which is why I sleep with a notebook and pen close to hand.

I’ve always considered myself to be an organised person, but even with my colour coded diary, there always seems to be something that prevents me from sleeping until I have scribbled it down in the semi darkness. 

When you start university, you will be reminded that you are an ‘adult learner’ on an almost weekly basis.  This means the investment you make in your education is much greater than it ever was at school or college.  Although the tutors want you to pass and are incredibly supportive, there is no spoon feeding of information.  They will provide you with the basics so you are safe in practice, but if you want to get a good grade, then you have to be self motivated and put in a lot of work yourself. 

When you are a health care student, not only do you have written assessments such as essays and exams, you also have the added pressure of clinical placement and your practical assessments.  This all means organisational skills are key.  Below are some of my top tips;

Get a diary
I would be lost without my diary, which is covered in post-it notes and coloured tabs.  Along with black pens, a diary with plenty of room to write for each day is an essential purchase for any health care student. 

Early to bed, early to rise
Not only will you catch the early worm, but you will also be more productive and healthier!  Too many times I have tried to burn the candle at both ends, with a 05.30am alarm for an early shift and then staying up until the small hours.  The result was burn out.
 
Make lists
One of the simplest joys in life is to cross things off your to do list.  It is often a good idea to break things down to smaller tasks which are manageable rather than popping down ‘dissertation’ and then carrying it over from day to day.  

Plan your day, week and month
During busy periods I have been known to plan my day hour by hour, but that is just me!  It is important you have an overview of what your month looks like so you can book in time for my last point…

Remember to rest
There is such as thing as working too hard!  It is important you take time to slow down and enjoy a day off.  Go for coffee with a friend, watch a film, stay in bed until 1pm, take the dog for a walk, however you relax, but make sure it has nothing to do with your course.  Otherwise, it is very easy to get lost down the rabbit hole.

Hope that has been helpful. See you next week. 

On a final note, if you get a chance to watch Childbirth: All or Nothing on BBC iplayer, I recommend you do.  It makes very interesting viewing and has sparked debate within our cohort. 

Back to Basics

Early in November last year I attended a Midwife Study Day in London about pre-eclampsia (hosted

APEC

by APEC).  Sandwiched between the morning coffee break and lunch was a presentation about the importance of accurately measuring blood pressure and urinalysis.  Now, I can’t have been the only person who was internally rolling their eyes.  These are skills we master in our first year of training, and I was surrounded by a wealth of experienced midwives practicing in a range of clinical practice areas.  Why had we travelled all this way to be taught a basic skill by an obstetric physician who, by their own admission, probably had a hundredth of the practical experience of the delegates?

But as I listened, I realised that for as much confidence I had in my ability to accurately measure blood pressure and the optimum conditions under which to do it, there were a number of details I had forgotten.  It is like learning to drive; when you are under instruction you diligently check every blind spot before starting off, you mentally chant “only a fool breaks the two second rule” to ensure you are travelling at a safe distance from the vehicle in front, you tell yourself, “it’s a speed limit, not a speed target”. But soon after you pass your test, and once you get over the initial thrill of flying (well,

Being a midwifery student is a bit like learning to drive

driving) solo, you start to cut corners, although not literally hopefully!  You quickly glance in your mirrors (and maybe over your shoulder) before you pull out into traffic, you get slightly closer to the slow moving car in front of you, well, the speed limit is 60 down that road!

It dawned on me as I sat in that air conditioned basement of a conference room, that I was guilty of doing the same thing in my clinical practice.  Not on the big things of course, I’m not confessing negligence.  Nor am I suggesting that I know everything – far from it.  However, as I reflected, I realised how my confidence in practice may also be limiting me.  Skills like taking a blood pressure I now do without thinking, whereas I used to listen intently for the quiet dub dub dub of the heart beat.  I used to excitedly pull my sterile gloves over my shaking hands as soon as the women first involuntarily pushed, thinking the baby was imminent, but now, I wait until I see the hair on the

Midwifery 101

baby’s head before I open the delivery pack!  How many times have you driven home and as you park, realise you have no memory of the journey? 

Don't get me wrong, confidence and familiarity is a good thing.  I would be worried if I still had the apprehensions and hesitations I did in my first year, and so would my mentors and tutors!  But on the other hand, I need to ensure the care I give is still as diligent and considered as it was when I was mastering the skill. So, as I continue with my final year of study, I have made a promise to turn my focus back to basics.

Well, hello to you!

Who wouldn't want to study here?

Welcome to my first blog.  I couldn't really think of an exciting way to introduce myself, so I thought I would do a short interview.

Name: Cat Cracknell

Age: 27

What are you studying at the University of Bedfordshire?
BSc Midwifery (Pre-Registration)

Why did you choose the University of Bedfordshire?
When I was applying via UCAS, I decided if I was applying to one university, I may as well apply to as many as I could.  My sister was studying at the University of Bedfordshire, so I thought I would apply here as well as she had had a good experience and liked the area.  The course structure and facilities available at UoB are also excellent and really made my decision very easy!

What did you do before your current course?
I have a degree in Drama from Loughborough University.  After I graduated, I wasn’t really sure what I wanted to do so I worked as a teaching assistant for a while before moving to London and working for the National Youth Theatre for two years.

We are all a little bit crazy!

Why midwifery?
Many of my family and friends work in the NHS in various roles.  I wanted a career where I could care for people but didn’t feel nursing was right for me.  I felt drawn to supporting women during their journey to motherhood.  I also thought I had the right personality and character strengths to be a good midwife.

What is your favourite aspect of your course?
I have the most fantastic job in the world! I have also made an amazing group of friends who share my sense of humour and support me through the ups and downs of being a student midwife.

What is the hardest part of your course?
It’s never nice when a tragedy occurs, but the support you receive as a student is second to none.  You also have the usual stresses of being a student, such as having no money, assignment deadlines, balancing work and having a life!  It is absolutely worth it though.

What is coming up in the next few weeks?

RCM

The dreaded dissertation writing! Our unit is also being visited by Cathy Warwick, Chief Executive of the RCM which is exciting.  Lots of new experiences for me to blog about…

So that’s me.  I am looking forward to blogging about the last few months of my course and hopefully give you an insight into life as a student midwife at UoB.  See you next week!